Christmas With... Susan Illene + Giveaway!
An
Unexpected Gift
By
Susan Illene
The sun set hours
ago and all Brandi could think about was getting home safely. Not
many people braved the streets at nine o’clock on Christmas Eve and
certainly not in this weather. Her headlights fought to penetrate the
heavy snow swirling in front of her car. She was used to this kind of
thing after living in Alaska her whole life, but this blizzard was
worse than most. It reminded her of a previous storm—one she did
not want to relive again.
Brandi gripped the
steering wheel harder as her vehicle briefly lost traction on the
road. Conditions were getting worse and she still had several miles
to go. How was she ever going to make it? If she’d had the money
to replace her tires, she would have, but funds had been tight
lately. That was the whole reason why she was coming home so late.
She’d worked overtime at the mall in the hopes of catching up on
her bills.
A porch light glowed
up ahead at a recently built tavern. The place could have come
straight out of the Middle Ages with its white-washed walls,
dark-wood trim, and a thatched roof that somehow defied all types of
weather. It sat on the outskirts of Fairbanks. Brandi had passed it a
hundred times, but she’d never had any desire to stop there.
Something about the tavern didn’t sit right with her. The place had
an otherworldly quality to it that couldn’t be normal.
Tonight, though, it
stood out like a beacon—a refuge where she could wait for the
winter storm to pass. Any reservations she might have had about the
tavern were dwarfed by her need to get off the road. Brandi pulled
her car into the lot, managing to find an empty space without too
much snow packing it. She zipped her coat up to her neck and pulled
her hood over her head before pushing the door open. A cold rush of
wind hit her face as soon as she got out and snow stung her eyes.
Shivering, she hurried for the entrance. Bars usually weren’t her
scene, but she’d make an exception tonight.
Warmth greeted her
when Brandi stepped inside. She stomped the snow off her boots on the
welcome mat and took a look around. Two large, lit fireplaces set at
each end of the tavern made it feel cozy, along with a full house of
patrons. The interior appeared just as old-fashioned as the exterior:
the same white-washed walls and wooden trim as well as heavy beams
running across the ceiling. Most of the lighting came from lanterns
set on the tables and concealed electric lights behind the bar.
Her nose twitched at
the myriad of scents—wood-smoke, beer, and sweat. There was also a
hint of pine coming from the Christmas tree near the door. Overall,
the atmosphere was jovial as friends talked and laughed with each
other.
Brandi felt awkward
and out of place. She avoided meeting anyone’s eyes as she searched
for somewhere to sit. All the tables were taken and though she caught
a few offers to join others, she ignored them. The voices sounded
friendly enough, but something wasn’t quite right. Some sixth sense
that told her that she didn’t belong and should leave.
She told herself it
was only because she’d avoided being in social settings for so long
that she’d forgotten what it was like. Not because she might have
seen a flash of overly-sharp teeth on one man or pointed ears on
another. If not for the weather, she might have run out of there
right then. Instead, she headed for an empty stool near the end of
the bar. The storm would pass in an hour and then she could go. She
just had to keep calm and avoid drawing attention until then.
A bartender with a
thick beard and eyes that reminded her of a wolf appeared to take her
order. She managed to mumble a request for whatever was on tap. A
moment later he brought her an overflowing mug of room-temperature
ale. Brandi grimaced as she sipped it, but she didn’t dare
complain.
“You’re a brave
little mortal to come in here alone.” This came from a dark-haired
man sitting in the next stool over.
She froze. “What’s
that supposed to mean?”
“You’ll find out
soon enough.”
Before Brandi could
question him further, he took his drink and left for a nearby table
where two women sat. It was then she realized a few too many people
were staring at her. Some of them had eyes far too dark to be human.
Others stood out because of the vibe of danger surrounding them.
Dear God, had she
just walked into a supernatural bar? Ever since sups had made
themselves public, Brandi had made a point of avoiding them, but
tonight she’d been too tired and scared of the roads to worry about
it. Why hadn’t she listened to her instincts when she’d first
come into the place?
A tall blond woman
who carried herself like she was ready for battle any minute headed
toward Brandi. She had the urge to shrink into herself, but she kept
her back straight and met the woman’s eyes. They were dark without
a hint of color. The kind she’d heard vampires had. It was only her
long blond hair falling loosely to her waist that softened her
features. Brandi’s hair was almost the exact same shade, but she
kept hers cut to shoulder length.
“You didn’t read
the sign by the door, did you?” the female vampire asked.
“The sign?” She
hadn’t noticed a sign, but she hadn’t been looking for one,
either.
“Humans enter
alone at their own risk.”
“Oh, I…”
Brandi gave a panicked look to the front door. Could she possibly
make it through the crowd without anyone stopping her? Patrons who’d
appeared friendly when she’d first arrived now looked hungry. Very
hungry.
“I’m Kariann,”
the vampire said, giving her a smile that didn’t look quite as
scary as the others.
“I’m Brandi,”
she whispered.
“It’s nice to
meet you, Brandi.” Kariann nodded her head. “I’m going to give
you a break since it is Christmas and help you out.”
She swallowed. “Help
me out? How?”
“If you want to be
safe in here, you need a protector. I’ve got just the guy for the
job.” Kariann’s eyes flashed with a hint of mischievous humor.
There was a joke in there that Brandi had to be missing.
“I’ll just go.”
She slid off her stool.
“Nonsense. You
can’t leave in this weather.” Kariann took hold of Brandi’s arm
and guided her toward the back corner of the room. “I’d feel
guilty if something happened to you.”
“Yeah, because
staying here with vampires and…other things is so safe,” Brandi
said, dragging her feet in the hope it would slow Kariann down.
She’d escaped
dying once before, but ever since then she’d been subconsciously
waiting for round two. Not that she’d imagined getting killed by
supernaturals. Her fears ran more toward winter storms and slick
roads. Had she traded one kind of death for another?
“Don’t worry,”
Kariann reassured her. “Part of my job is to keep the peace between
humans and supernaturals. Just be glad you didn’t come on a
different night when I wasn’t here.”
Brandi glanced down
at the vamp’s hand on her arm. “Yeah, you’re very convincing.”
“Oh, good. You’ve
got a little fire in you. That should help.”
They stopped in
front of a small table where a solitary man sat. Long black hair hid
his downturned face, but when he looked up, Brandi’s heart leaped
into her throat. He was the most beautiful and frightening man she’d
ever seen. He had pale skin with an olive tint, square jaw, large
nose, and silver eyes that swirled in lazy movements like a snake’s.
She had the impression he could kill her in two seconds flat and go
on about his business without ever thinking of her again. Kariann
wanted this guy
to be her protector? She was doomed.
“This is Kerbasi,”
she introduced. “He’s older than Babylon and cranky as hell, but
if you stay with him no one will mess with you.”
“You can’t be
serious.” Brandi would have felt safer standing in front of a
speeding train. Hell, Kariann suddenly didn’t seem that bad—or
any of the other patrons in the place for that matter.
“Exactly my
thoughts,” Kerbasi said, scowling up at them. “I did not come
here to babysit a human.”
“I’m not staying
with him.” Brandi shook her head.
Kariann made an
exasperated noise. “He’s forbidden from killing humans. No one
else in this bar can say the same.”
“Is that supposed
to make me feel better?” That was like handing someone a plate of
food and promising it wasn’t poisoned. Except that once they
brought the idea of poison up, there was no getting that thought out
of one’s head.
A malevolent smile
crossed Kerbasi’s face. “It’s not my ability to kill that
people fear. It’s my ability to inflict pain over long periods of
time without causing death that worries them.”
Brandi felt her
knees turn weak. He was more than a little proud of himself for that.
Kariann leaned down
until her nose practically touched his. “You are going to watch
her, be nice to her, and make sure she gets home safe.”
His eyes narrowed.
“I’ll do no such thing.”
“Yes, you will, or
I swear by all that is holy I’ll fill your home with sex toys and
tell everyone you’ve been visiting brothels.”
Brandi’s gaze ran
between them. What kind of threat was that? She was rather certain
there weren’t any brothels in Fairbanks, but it wasn’t like she’d
ever had a reason to ask.
“You wouldn’t,”
Kerbasi said through gritted teeth.
Kariann smiled. “You
know I would. It might even be good for your image.”
“I could kill you
where you stand.”
“Promises,
promises.”
The man with ancient
eyes turned his attention to Brandi. He studied her in a way that
made her think he could see every one of her secrets. Did he have
that kind of power? She couldn’t begin to guess what kind of
supernatural he might be. Her heart started beating so hard in her
chest she suspected the entire room could hear it, even above the
din. She stumbled back a step and bumped into another patron’s
chair. The woman sitting there turned, her eyes darkening. Kariann
growled at her and pulled Brandi away.
Kerbasi let out a
martyred sigh and relaxed his shoulders. “Very well, but only
because I find her interesting.”
“Good.” Kariann
shoved Brandi into a chair. “Then I’m sure you two will get along
just fine.”
The female vampire
sauntered off without another word. Brandi avoided meeting Kerbasi’s
gaze and stared at the table instead. There was a glass on it that
looked like it only contained water. Why would he come to a bar if he
wasn’t going to drink any alcohol?
“I don’t bite,”
Kerbasi said after a few minutes passed. He sounded tired and bored.
Brandi hesitated.
“Then what do you do?”
“Torture,” he
paused to study his fingernails, “when the occasion calls for it.”
A shudder ran
through her. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
He shrugged. “I
prefer to focus my attention on supernaturals. Humans are too frail.”
Kariann appeared
with a fresh mug of ale for Brandi. She set it down on the table and
then smacked the back of Kerbasi’s head. “Stop scaring her,
guardian. You’ve been out of the torture business since last year.”
He rose from his
seat with a murderous expression. Brandi scraped her chair back. No
way was she going to get between these two psychos. He took hold of
Kariann’s arms and a moment later they both vanished in a bright
flash of light.
The tavern became
still and quiet. Not wanting to look but knowing she must, Brandi
turned her head. Most of the patrons stared at her or whispered to
their companions. Was this what it felt like to be cornered by
predators? Before she could formulate a plan, a hand fell on her
shoulder. It squeezed hard and jerked her from her chair.
“My friends told
me coming to Fairbanks would be fun. It appears they were right,”
said her assailant. She gaped at the pale face of a man with black
eyes and sharp protruding fangs. He couldn’t have been much older
than her at thirty, but since he was a vampire his looks might have
been deceiving.
She kicked and
flailed, but he was too strong for her. Nothing could break the grip
he had on her arms. He must have had shins of steel too because he
didn’t even flinch when her boots struck him. Brandi saw her life
flashing before her eyes as he leaned down, moving his mouth toward
her neck. She tried to stretch away and push at his chest, but he
didn’t budge.
Then he caught her
gaze and her muscles went limp. For reasons she couldn’t
understand, she had no will to fight anymore. A tear slid down her
cheek. It was over. Brandi didn’t have to worry about how or when
she’d die anymore. She had her answer.
Just as the sharp
points grazed her skin, she was jerked away. Kerbasi set her down
next to him and took a step toward her assailant. His presence filled
the room so completely that she couldn’t help staring at him. Were
those wings starting to protrude out of his back? He also seemed much
bigger than when he’d been sitting in his chair before. Brandi was
tall for a woman, coming in at 5’10”. Kerbasi had to be around
six and a half feet.
He reached out a
hand and wrapped it around the vampire’s neck. “What do you think
you are doing?”
“She was fair
game,” the vamp replied.
Kerbasi jerked him
closer. “You did not notice her sitting at my
table?”
“You left,” he
choked. “I thought you were done with her.”
Kerbasi’s gaze
hardened. “You’re new to town, aren’t you?”
“What does that
matter?”
“Only a fool would
touch this woman while I was gone,” he paused to scan the room.
“They might look at her, but no one here would be stupid enough to
touch what I’ve sworn to protect.”
“Who..are you?”
the vampire stammered.
Brandi noted his
fangs had slid back into his gums. He might have been terrifying a
minute ago, but now he looked like a teenage boy caught stealing. She
could hardly blame him. Kerbasi was rather frightening and yet she
couldn’t help feeling a small thrill that his anger was over
concern for her. No one had ever defended her like that before.
The gray wings she’d
caught protruding from his back flared out, knocking several people
and chairs over. They scooted away without a word. “I’m a
guardian from Purgatory. True immortals know me for my ability to
inflict endless pain on my victims. I gain great pleasure from it.
Now who are you to question me?”
Though Brandi hadn’t
thought it possible, the vampire grew paler. “Nobody. And I wasn’t
going to kill her. I was playing by the rules and was only going to
take a small drink.”
“Perhaps.”
Kerbasi narrowed his eyes at the vampire. “But if you’re no one,
it won’t matter if you die.”
Brandi couldn’t
stand by any longer. She dug down deep until she found the well of
courage that had been buried for far too long. She wouldn’t watch
someone die on Christmas Eve—even if the vampire had tried to hurt
her.
“Don’t kill
him.” She touched Kerbasi’s arm.
The guardian glanced
over at her, silver eyes swirling. “He cannot go unpunished.”
“No,” she
agreed. The vamp had attacked her after all. “But he doesn’t need
to die. I don’t want to be part of any more death.”
He let out a heavy
sigh. “Very well.”
In a swift movement
she barely caught, he snapped the vampire’s neck and let the body
fall to the floor with a heavy thud.
“Dump him
outside,” Kerbasi ordered two men. They didn’t hesitate to follow
his instructions.
“That didn’t
kill him?” Brandi asked, watching in horror as they carried the
limp body away.
“No,” Kerbasi
replied, settling comfortably back in his seat. His wings had
disappeared again. “He’ll be back up and moving before dawn.”
That didn’t seem
so bad, but there was still one other problem Brandi had noted.
“Where’s Kariann?”
The female vampire
was nowhere to be seen.
“Sit,” Kerbasi
ordered.
Brandi dropped into
her chair. “What did you do to her?”
“I took her home.”
A corner of his mouth curled up. “It will take some time for her to
return.”
Brandi probably
should have left it at that, but curiosity got the better of her. He
had disappeared into thin air, after all. “How? Did you teleport or
something?”
“That is one way
of describing it, though most of us call it flashing.”
Her brows knitted.
“Is that something only guardians can do?”
“Anyone who is at
least half-angel can do it.”
Brandi’s jaw
dropped. “You’re an angel?”
“Not quite. There
is a hierarchy, but I may one day rise to become one.”
She mulled that
over. “I’m pretty certain you’re going to have to stop killing
and torturing people if you want to reach that level.”
“You catch on
quickly,” he said, perturbance in his tone.
Brandi had never
believed in those sorts of things before supernaturals came out into
the open. Even after they did, she had a hard time believing they
were real. To her, it had all seemed like some sort of practical
joke. Vampires, werewolves, fairies—they were the stuff of movies
and legends. How could they have been around all this time and no one
knew about it until this year?
“Right. And you
left Purgatory to live in Alaska?” She couldn’t begin to imagine
what Purgatory would be like, but if he was going for a vacation spot
from there, Hawaii might have been a better choice. Or had he come
here for some other reason?
“It is a long
story.” He made a dismissive gesture. “I’d rather talk about
you and what brought you to this place tonight.”
She shrugged. “The
weather was too bad to drive home—and I’ve got nowhere else to
be, anyway.”
“On that point, we
are similar.”
“You don’t have
any friends or family?” Brandi asked, cocking her head.
“Kariann is the
closest thing I have to a friend, though I’m not certain I’d call
her that. Most others find me intolerable.” His tone was
indifferent, but his hunched shoulders told her a different story.
There was a hint of vulnerability within him that he couldn’t quite
hide. Did he behave the way he did to keep people at a distance?
She’d been guilty of doing that herself.
Brandi felt some of
the tension ease inside her. Whether you were human or supernatural,
the world could still be a tough place. “I guess that’s another
thing we have in common. No one wants to be around me, either.”
“Perhaps, but
perhaps not.” He cocked his head and gave her a perceptive look. “I
suspect your loneliness is by your own making.”
Brandi narrowed her
eyes. “You don’t know anything about me.”
“Do not be so
certain.” Kerbasi leaned forward, gazed deeply into her eyes and
spoke in a low tone. “I know your parents died in a car
accident—one in which you were the driver. It wasn’t your fault,
but you blame yourself anyway and you’ve pushed everyone out of
your life until there is no one left. Even with my vast experience, I
doubt I could have made you more miserable. Quite an impressive
feat.”
She sucked in a
sharp breath. “How could you possibly know all that?”
“Your mind is an
open book to me,” he said, sitting back and giving her a piteous
look. “Call it a gift or a curse, but I can discern almost anyone’s
darkest secrets—should I choose to do so.”
She wouldn’t want
that kind of gift. Dealing with her own problems was bad enough.
Brandi stared down at her lap and took a shuddering breath. “I
don’t deserve to be happy.”
She’d avoided
talking to anyone about the accident that happened over two years
ago. One that she’d survived and her parents didn’t. No matter
how much her sister and friends tried to help her in the beginning,
she’d pushed them away. They didn’t understand and she didn’t
deserve their compassion.
Brandi had known the
weather was bad that day—much like tonight. When her parents
insisted they were braving it anyway, she’d offered to drive.
Nothing could have stopped them from seeing their first grandchild
born. She’d wanted to be there too, though she’d known it was
risky.
While her older
sister brought one life into the world, Brandi took two out. The car
had slid off the road and sideways into a patch of trees. Her mother
died instantly and her father during the drive in the ambulance. She
saw her niece briefly while staying at the same hospital, but then
she’d hid herself away. The guilt had been too much.
“Does anyone
deserve happiness?” Kerbasi asked.
Brandi squeezed her
eyes shut. Pain. Too much pain. “Good people do.”
“There was a time
when your suffering would have pleased me,” Kerbasi muttered, “but
I fear I’ve grown soft.”
She lifted her lids
and glanced toward the window at the front of the tavern. The snow
was letting up. “I should go.”
“To your home?
That would be boring.”
For a moment, Brandi
forgot her misery. “What do you care?”
“I certainly
shouldn’t.” He took hold of her hands and gently brought her to
her feet. “But perhaps neither of us should be alone tonight.”
A tingling feeling
raced up her spine. “What are you…?”
Bright light flashed
all around them and the bar disappeared. Wind rushed through her hair
with a roaring sound and a kaleidoscope of colors zoomed past them.
Were they traveling through some kind of vortex? The whooshing
stopped almost as soon as it started. Brandi had to hold onto
Kerbasi’s arms until everything stopped spinning. Then the frigid
cold hit her. Brandi lifted her face and a fat flake of snow touched
her forehead.
She shivered. “You
brought me outside?”
“My apologies. I
forget humans are more susceptible to the cold.” His silver eyes
lit up and a moment later a bubble of heat enveloped them.
It startled her.
This man packed some serious kinds of powers. It was scary and yet
thrilling at the same time. Brandi took a cautious step back,
grateful when the magical heat didn’t leave her. She took in her
surroundings. She knew right away where he’d brought her. She’d
visited this place enough times, especially as a child during the
holidays.
Ice sculptures
surrounded them in all sorts of shapes and sizes. There were
reindeer, nativity scenes, polar bears, Christmas trees, and all
sorts of other creations. Each of them was lit up with lights in
various colors to make them appear almost mystical. She used to love
this place. Had Kerbasi pulled those memories from her head, too?
“You brought us to
the ice park in North Pole?” she asked incredulously. It wasn’t
The
North Pole, but rather a town near Fairbanks.
His lips lifted into
a half-smile. “I discovered this place recently. No one else knows
I come here at night after it is closed.”
She knitted her
brows. “Why would you hide it?”
“I may have
cultivated the impression among those who know me that I do not like
Christmas—or its strange traditions.” He stopped before an ice
castle, studying it. “I wouldn’t want to ruin that image.”
She followed him as
he moved on to the next sculpture of a unicorn. “They think you’re
a scrooge.”
Brandi could relate
to that. She’d pretty much ignored all things Christmas since her
parents died. Whenever people discussed it at work, she usually
changed the subject or walked away. Even Christmas music was enough
to make her want to run screaming. It was all she could do to survive
working at the mall. If there’d been any other job available, she
would have taken it. That was what she got for wrecking her old life.
“I suppose that is
one way of putting it,” he replied. “We did not celebrate
holidays in Purgatory. I had some difficulty adjusting when I first
came here.”
They continued
through the park, pausing before each ice carving. Neither of them
spoke for a while. They just soaked in the peace and quiet that the
night had to offer. She studied Kerbasi’s profile, noting a slight
softening of his features as he took in a group of sculptures with
children playing. There was something tragic about him. Even back in
the bar where it was crowded with people he’d seemed so completely
alone. Had he ever experienced love or true friendship?
“What was it like
for you as a child?”
“Me? A child?”
He let out a bark of laughter. “I came into the world exactly as
you see me now. There is no childhood for guardians or angels.”
“That’s…sad.”
She didn’t know what else to say. It wasn’t something Brandi had
ever considered before.
His shoulders
stiffened. “Do not pity me. I cannot miss what I’ve never had.
You are the one who has suffered true loss. It is worse to have
something precious taken from you.”
She thought of her
family and her eyes moistened. “Maybe, but at least I know how good
life can be. There’s a chance I can find something like that
again.”
“You’d have to
forgive yourself first.”
Brandi couldn’t
argue with him there. She had no idea if she could ever get past her
parents’ deaths. “So what is your excuse? What is stopping you
from having a life now?”
“My time on Earth
is finite.” He expelled a heavy breath, fogging the air. “There
is little point in getting attached to anyone.”
“Why did they send
you here?”
The minutes
stretched into an uncomfortable silence before he finally spoke. “To
find my humanity.”
Brandi’s feet
crunched in the snow as she moved closer to him. “Have you found it
yet?”
“How would I
know?” he asked, exasperation in his voice.
“When you don’t
feel lonely anymore and find peace within yourself.”
His gaze met hers.
“I suppose we are two of a kind after all.”
She didn’t know
this man well, but she felt a kinship with him. Two lost souls trying
to find their way in a world where they didn’t quite fit. Maybe it
was crazy. Maybe it was wishful thinking. Yet Brandi couldn’t help
wondering if she was meant to meet Kerbasi now, in this time and
place.
“I’ll help you
if you help me,” she said, taking his hand.
He gazed down at
their linked hands and then up to her face. Was he searching her mind
to see if her offer was genuine? Could he learn to trust her? Could
she learn to trust him? Brandi was frightened by the prospect of what
she’d just suggested, but it was also the first time she’d truly
felt alive in a long time. If she could help him heal, maybe she
could heal, too.
“I shall consider
it,” he answered.
She ducked her head,
feeling embarrassed. He probably thought she was crazy and he’d be
right. It had been so long since she’d talked to anyone that she
wasn’t thinking straight. The loneliness had finally gotten to her
so that even a supernatural known for torture didn’t seem that bad.
Yet she truly felt there was a good man underneath the hardened
exterior. She hoped he could see that in her mind.
“Don’t.”
Kerbasi took hold of her chin. “You do not know me well enough to
make any opinion.”
“But…”
“Come, I have one
more place I would take you,” he interrupted.
Once again, bright
light flashed around them and they traveled through the vortex. When
her feet settled beneath her, she found herself standing on a porch
in front of a familiar house. The curtains were partially open from
the front window and she could see a family inside. They sat gathered
together on their couch watching a movie. Between two parents there
was a little girl with ringlets of blond hair surrounding her face.
She was beautiful and perfect—even more so than Brandi had
imagined.
A lump rose in her
throat. “This is my sister’s house.”
“She’s in there
thinking of you now. I can hear her thoughts.” Kerbasi gently
rubbed Brandi’s cheek. “Don’t let another year go by without
the people you love.”
She wrapped her arms
around the guardian and hugged him tightly. “Thank you.”
“Show me how it is
done and perhaps I’ll learn from you,” he said, breaking away
from her and taking a step back.
“Will I see you
again?” She could see it in his eyes that he’d resigned himself
to letting her go. She was surprised by how much she didn’t want
him to leave.
“Take care of
yourself, Brandi.”
There was no flash
of light this time. Kerbasi simply disappeared. He might not be an
angel, but he’d been her guardian on Christmas Eve. She could only
hope she’d see him again someday. He deserved to heal as much as
her.
Brandi took a few
moments to collect herself before knocking on the door. When her
sister opened it, she knew everything was going to be alright. They
were hugging and crying before either got a word out.
Giveaway
